~**-PiEcE Of A BeAutIfuL MeMoRy-**~

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Its Raining again,
the day rained n it made my day a little less happier..got up early today for math lesson..it wasnt close to a lesson,basically its a self study.mr lathiff wasnt there for us..he was around but he's with the sec 3s..i guess we're less important huh.oh whatever..the day kinda sucked up for me since the beginning of the day..at 9 all the way to 12,we stayed around to practice math..i could understand alil of it now..still requires more practice thou..my friends and i were all kinda bored since we had to study by ourselves,while doing math we munched n munched all the junks that we brought that i hardly ate lunch after that.

I think today is the worst day of my practical life!!!i just dont understand why people are constantly getting on my nerves..why luh why..i wanna scream but i cant,i wanna rant but i might hurt..i feel chocked at the tip of my throat cuz i just cant seem to let it out.n what did i do?i slept on it..i took a short nap n thinkin that it would subside upon waking up but NO!i can still feel apart of me that is not right!so i got up,washed my face,swallowed down panadol pills..went back to sleep..but this time i tossed n turned..feeling frustrated,i simply got up again n sat by the window just looking at cars passing by..weirdly,i imagined horrible things..like what if i die now knocked down by a car?would people just be glad?would they even cry a tear for me?how would things turn out to be after im gone?will life still be as perfect?would i make the world a lil less burden?simply cuz i have done nuthin much to create sumthin wonderful in the eyes of people..im not trying to be emotional here but these are the things that went through my mind.sometimes i just feel not worth living.

I'm the kinda girl who hates to be overly protected n unfortunately i have a set of parents who are doin it to me.i hate to be patronized..i just wanna be set free..i know i always refrain from expressing my emotions n ending up bottling my anger,my hate,my loneliness..my whatever.the feelings accumulate itself making me chock on it.its obviously not a good feeling.yes i agree letting it out can be relieving but sometimes i just dun feel like letting it out.its frustrating..when im angry or moody..i tend to shut myself up..its just how the way things work for me..i dont think saying anything further will do any good.cuz i'll either start pissing people off or cry endlessly.its that crucial.so just leave me alone n let me have my moment.its better that way. peace.

I'm gonna end it off here.Get back soon.

- Pure Bliss... ;